You Don't Mess Around with ...

I am pretty sure everybody hates a bully. When we were children, they did not makes such a big deal out of bullies like they do today. Nowadays, they call an intervention between the school Pprincipal, the school psychologist, the parents of the students, the students themselves, the teachers ... Back in my day they just took out the paddle and swatted the kids butt or if your parent's got a call from their parents – your parents took out the paddle and swatted your butt. If parents did that today social service would be at their door ready to put their kids in a foster home, LOL. 

When I was growing up, there was not much bullying when we were young kids. I remember there was a girl named Judy (I was in kindergarten at the time) she was a fifth grader. Everybody called her (including me) Judy Cootie. In my defense, I had no clue that this was mean. I did not even know what the "cooties" meant. I just followed suit on the playground with the other little kids yelling, "Judy has the cooties," By second grade I realized how mean that was and stopped following along with the rest of the children, I would tell them to stop picking on others. I was a leader, not a follower.  

There were times that people deserved to get beat up or picked on. Michael was so mean to these two heavy-set twins that they chased him home from school three times a week. He deserved it when they threw rocks at him and ganged up on him as a team. (Keep in mind, Michael only called one brother a name at a time – they were way bigger than him) Michael would wear one of those hooded jackets (vinyl) and pull the hood over his head to try and hide when the twins were together. He had to buy a different color jacket every few weeks, red, blue, yellow, to throw them off guard on their walk home. Yet, Michael kept calling them names, so in their defense, it was justified that he be chased home every other day by the twins. 

When I switched schools in ninth grade, I have my first taste of being "bullied." I was so excited to be with my new friends and was pretty shocked when the first day of my new school I was punched in the back. I was sure it was a mistake until Beth started calling me all these horrible names. I never met this girl before in my life, nor did she have any reason to call me names and hit me. This began several months of complete and utter torture.

Beth and her "gang" would beat me up every time I was at my locker, every day after school – pretty much whenever they could. I had come from a school where I was not only well liked, but pretty popular. The worse part of the situation was that my friends and family would not defend me, they were so scared for themselves that they all ran away and left this "gang" to beat me up every day. I told my parents, their solution was for me to tell the principal. So, I went to the principal who told me point blank – either just ignore them or fight back.

My parents decided that the solution was to drop me off at school and pick me up at school- I should avoid my locker and carry my books around with me to classes. PLEASE. I actually stuck to their plan and got beat up for about another three months, until one day I had quite enough. I found Beth (the largest and meanest of the crew) and pulled a "Ralphie" on her. Remember Ralphie, the boy from Christmas Story who goes crazy and beats up the bully after being picked on? Needless to say, those girls never picked on me again. The principal called me in his office and wanted to suspend me. I was flabbergasted and told him that I was following his advice. He relented and did not give me any punishment at all, after all he told me to defend myself I reminded him.  

After that I ,unfortunately, I became tougher and did not let others pick on me anymore. By the way, I saw Beth at a class reunion and when she tried to talk to me I would not give her the time of day- after all she made me miserable – on the other hand I should have thanked her for making me tougher and more resilient.  

When my children were picked on I nipped it right in the bud. I told them to defend themselves and not to let others step all over them. The plan was to first tell the person to stop bothering them, then tell the teacher, then tell the principal and then just defend yourself. It worked quite well for the most part.

One time a boy named Jason who lived on our street kept picking on my girls, to the point that he would come by our house and throw rocks at the window. I called his parents who laughed in my face and said, "boys will be boys." My kids were in third grade and kindergarten at the time and would come home crying from school. They went through the proper channels, teacher, principal, etc. to no avail. Then I let the girls handle it on their own accord. Jason never picked on my girls again, as a matter of fact, they all started playing together and became friends as they grew up. After what I had been through in ninth grade, there was no way my kids were getting picked on at all.

There will always be bullies ... there is nothing you can do to alleviate the fact that people are going to pick on other people – whether you are a child or an adult. All you can do is to learn to defend yourself and your loved ones, stick up for what is right. If we all stand up to bullies they will eventually back down, don't forget, It takes a village ...

Click here: Jim Croce - Don't Mess Around With Jim -HD - YouTube