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Health & Fitness

You Can't Please Everyone, so You Have to Please Yourself ...

But it's all right now I learned my lesson well You see you can't please everyone so You got to please yourself

There are times in life when you need to "bite your tongue" and not give an opinion. Please realize that for somebody like me, this is a difficult feat. First, I want to help the world... Literally. When somebody has a problem I want to help them solve it or get them help or just make them feel better. Maybe I have always wanted to take care of the people I love because my mother became ill when I was a young child and I had to help take care of my sisters. Maybe I was just born to take care of people, I know that being a mother came easy to me because of that ... The question really is when do you step back and not say anything, not help somebody, not give your opinion. When do you work to please other people and when do you work just to please yourself?

On the note of pleasing yourself, I can tell you I do not care for people who are self centered and selfish- I never have and never will. It bothers me when I do something to help somebody and they try to thank me- I do not expect thanks- I do things for others because it is my choice. I have a hard time respecting people who are self centered and only care about themselves, sometimes when I listen to them speak I bite my tongue so hard it is bleeding. (LOL). I remember asking somebody what she thought was the worst thing her children could do (Now, here I am thinking kill somebody? Rob a bank?) She answered me without hesitation, "volunteer their time". Now, in my opinion, how could you raise children who are not taught to give of themselves, to help others...? I was simply stunned by that answer.

Do people become selfish because they were raised that way? Is it inborn? Is it a personality trait or a learned behavior? I do not know. When do you cross the fine line of "pleasing yourself" and becoming a self centered person? When do you become too involved in trying to help others that it becomes a "job"? I think about all the people who are there for me- and all the people who are not because they are so wrapped up in their own lives. I know somebody whose father was dying, literally in hospice dying any moment, and she proceeded to tell me that she was going out to lunch with her friend and then shopping. If she had time later in the day, she would see her father, if he was still alive by then. I was shocked by her insensitive and selfish behavior. I wish I could have one single moment with my father and she was going to lunch in the final moments of her father's life. Wow. 

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The song Garden Party says, "You can't please everyone, so you got to please yourself." Was he referring to being selfish or was he simply stating that sometimes you have to do things that are not so popular. I would like to think that you can please yourself and still not be self centered... Or at least try! 

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